Hi Amigos!
Welcome back to another episode of the journey of pursuit podcast!
Today we talk about celebrating being multi-passionate, forgetting about perfectionism, and starting where you are!!
I share a mix of a few things that have been on my mind lately. The truth is you can love creating a lot of different things at once. We need to stop caring about what other people think and just learn by taking ACTION. Do it messy and see how much closer you get to your goal. The only thing standing in our way of pursuing what we love, is ourselves. Indulge in everything that calls your attention. Try many things and drop the ones that don’t speak to your heart. How else are you gonna know if something is for you, if you don’t even try? Fail and get back up. Go for it! The time is now 🤍 celebrate all parts of you 💫
TRANSCRIPT:
[00:00:00] Drea: Hi, welcome to the podcast.
Are you super excited to be on your first pod?
[00:00:05] Bren: This is my first pod and I'm so excited and just looking forward to it so this is going to be fun.
[00:00:12] Drea: I know. Same. I can't wait for everyone to hear your story.
Should
[00:00:15] Bren: we dive
[00:00:15] Drea: in?
[00:00:16] Bren: Yes, let's do it.
[00:00:18] Drea: Did you always know that you wanted to
[00:00:20] Bren: be an esthetician? Not at all. I did not even know that this career path existed. When I was like 8 to 10 years old, I would be in the kitchen, like making masks out of like oatmeal. And I used to love, this is a little gross, but I used to love sitting, on the floor with my dad after he, he was a runner and I would just like pop his black heads on his back.
And that was like my thrill. And, you know, I always really liked skincare, but, my assumption was that dermatology was the only option and med school was not gonna to be the path for me. So I went to another people helping career and I ended up getting my master's in clinical mental health. I went for psychology.
The goal was to be a marriage counselor, a family therapist, something like that but I ended up getting a job pretty quickly after, college, like while I was in my master's program. And I kind of just stayed there and realized that it wasn't for me, I really wanted to have something to call my own something that I can call the shots with.
So I was like, what do I like, what do I like? And skincare was kind of just like that thing that I always enjoyed. So I kind of just meshed everything that I liked into one. I went back to school for aesthetics while I was still working and a year later I kind of just dove out on my own and was like, let's, let's make this work.
[00:01:48] Drea: That's so cool. Can you actually talk about the difference between an esthetician and a dermatologist?
[00:01:53] Bren: Yeah, for sure. So an esthetician is trained essentially, most programs are like typically 600 to a thousand hours and you become licensed by the state that you live in.
Whereas a dermatologist, they, you know, go through med school and then they pick their focus, which tends to be like dermatology or something like that. And then they are licensed by the board of doctors.
[00:02:18] Drea: It's good to know that there's a difference and you can study one or the other.
[00:02:21] Bren: Yes, exactly.
[00:02:22] Drea: Once you decided that you wanted to be an esthetician and you went for it, what was it like then to kind of move forward and have your own practice or find clients? What was that process like for you?
[00:02:32] Bren: Oh, man, it was super, super challenging. So I remember I was about twenty-five when I got my first big girl job.
And by the time I left, I was, you know, in a very comfortable space. I had my own apartment, my bachelorette pad, and I was making decent money. So I had prepared for the event that I would be leaving and I had a small amount of savings. And I just basically said, I'm going to start out in my apartment. See if this is truly what I like.
I always have, you know, Masters to fall back on if I really didn't like it, but I was determined. I was determined to make it work. I started off with having my friends, let me practice on them and take videos and pictures. And then their friends were like, oh my God, I want to do that too. And little by little, my clientele grew very organically because I was based out of my home.
I. Made sure that I only worked with people. I knew because you know, letting people in your home and stuff like that. And then the pandemic hit and that changed everything completely. I was closed for about eight or nine months and I was left with no choice, but to open my own studio in my own space.
But that was honestly the best push for me because I was able to, you know, be public on Google and people were able to find me and grow my following and clientele.
[00:03:55] Drea: I think that's so smart because with friends, especially people that know you with any business, really word of mouth is everything. And I think that it's really important when you have a good word of mouth like that spreads like wildfire. You will get new clients everywhere because people that are talking about you are respected from other people. So that's such an intelligent way to start. And now you have your practice in New York.
[00:04:21] Bren: Yes, I am located in Brooklyn, New York. And I have my own two spot studio.
But it's still just me and I'm still very much super involved with my clients and just building those relationships . I personally feel like I'm growing very slowly, but I feel like the beauty is that I'm growing super organically and I know like my clients, siblings names, and I know what things are going on in their lives.
And for the goal of my business, it's not just here. Let me fix your skin. It's really just the holistic view of. Our mental wellness, our skin or confidence. So it's been working out for me.
[00:05:07] Drea: Yeah. And that relationship, like we were saying is everything. The fact that, you know, like their kids' names and things like that, that goes such a long way because they really feel like a part of your brand, the part of you, a part of what you do and they trust you.
They want to work with you more and they'll forever go to you when they think of an esthetician.
I love what you say in your bio, where you say that you want to change the world stigmas. That skincare is a luxury and that is solely restricted to one gender. Can you talk a little bit more about that?
I think it's so great. Now that so much has changed in our world that it's no longer just for women or just for a certain type of person.
I love that it's now more open. So can you talk a little bit more about that?
[00:05:48] Bren: Absolutely. So when I was in aesthetic school, our final project was essentially creating a plan. In an ideal world, what would you do? And. The only thing that I ever really wanted was to make it not so closed door.
Meaning that, for example, when I first got my well paying job, it was the first time I was able to do nice things for myself. So, you know, book a massage, book a facial, I grew up very. Lower middle-class single mom. So those things were not available very much DIY at home stuff. Yes, for sure. But when I first became able to access these things, I didn't feel welcome.
Like I felt like I was looked at like, is she actually going to spend the money? Is she actually gonna buy products? Is she going to tip? Like, that was the feeling I also was living at the time in a very predominantly white area, so that could have been adding to that. So my thing was, there's no way I'm ever going to open a spot like that.
I want to do the complete opposite. And I remember sitting at a dinner table and just telling people , I'm going to make skincare normal for men. , I don't know why that's not a thing. We brush our teeth, we wear deodorant. I'm going to make it normal. And the lucky thing is that most of my friends that I had practicing with in the beginning, are guys.
So I was like, you're going to lay down and you're going to let me do a facial on you. And the photos people were like, oh my God, you do facials for guys. Like I used to get those messages in the beginning all the time. Like my boyfriend really needs a facial or I've been looking for someone I didn't even know.
In the beginning, this is only like three or four years ago. When I was doing local research, some places would literally say no men. Like we don't do male facials. And that would blow my mind because I'm like, that's just so exclusive and not to mention a lot of people didn't have experience in skin of color.
A lot of people don't know what to do when their client is transitioning from male to female or from female to male. And that really affects people's, you know, confidence. It affects everything. And I just decided to go the complete opposite route. I was like everyone, except the people who don't believe in this,
[00:08:13] Drea: that is so true. I love that that's your mission?
Like how cool to have someone have that as a mission?
[00:08:20] Bren: Thank you.
[00:08:22] Drea: Thank you. You know, I actually talk about this a lot with my mom. Cause as Latinas, my mom is from and she's darker skinned than me. I'm super fair, but it's the European side of me that, you know, I have as my skin color and even in our skin routine, like our skincare routine, what she uses doesn't work on.
And I mean, obviously the age difference is a big factor too I love this topic so much. It's interesting to me first, cause I love skincare so much and anyone that knows me knows I, and I know you will agree with me. I live to put on SPF.
[00:09:00] Bren: Yes beautiful.
[00:09:05] Drea: I love SPF and , we have this conversation all the time.
My mom and I, because her growing up in Cartagena, especially in her twenties, SPF wasn't normal, they would actually wear coconut oil instead of sunblock. So growing up. I remember she was always so careful with my skin because she ended up growing up in her twenties, thirties, and then having melasma.
I remember growing up and she was always so careful with my skin saying, you know, you're going to regret it. If you don't take care of your skin. And it always stuck with me so much that I always wear sunblock now , but it was just something that we had always bonded about or talked about because she always tried to teach me things that she didn't know. You know, growing up and always showing me, even though we have different, skin tones, just the importance of how to treat yourself and your skin and how to take care of your body and how that can affect you in the long run.
[00:10:08] Bren: Absolutely. I totally agree with that. And even like, you're, you're mentioning two people in the same family having completely different skin tones, like. Imagine going somewhere to get a facial with your mom and then being like, we don't know what to do with her, like mind blowing. And this is only a few years ago.
Like I do think the pandemic has changed that conversation significantly almost overnight, but there's so much room left to have that conversation
[00:10:39] Drea: for sure. And I think that especially beautiful people like you who are making this, their mission can really make a change and really start a conversation.
And you and your practice make people feel like yes, you're welcome here. And we're going to make you feel beautiful and, experience something that maybe somewhere else isn't accepted, but here.
[00:11:01] Bren: Yes. That is the goal at the forefront.
Always
[00:11:05] Drea: Now that you have your practice and you've been doing it for some time and you know what, you're kind of headed for what your real mission is and what you want your purpose to be in the world.
What would you say is kind of your hardships throughout the days or the weeks that you have to remind yourself why you're doing this such a young age and why you've gone through the ups and downs
[00:11:29] Bren: I would say my hardships are definitely the fact that. Early business owner, you kind of just wear every hat.
So I learned how to make a website. I learned graphics, I learned social media, which I didn't even have a personal Instagram for two years. I am very new to that entire world, but I had to learn so many different things for my business to thrive. And I think when. You try so many things, you're bound to fail at something.
And that there's nothing wrong with that at all. But when you're, getting home tired and then you put so much effort into something and it fails, or I don't know, even like customer service, , I personally am the type of person that wants to give everything 110% and that's not feasible all the time.
I want to respond to people quickly and all of that. So definitely. Learning how to be kind to myself and telling myself like you are wearing all these hats. It's okay to not be perfect at everything. And learning how to ask for help is a huge thing that I would personally do differently. If I could take back two years to the beginning of starting this again, because.
I don't know if it's the Latina in me. I don't know if it's the first gen in me. I don't know if it's because I was raised by a single mother, but it's very much like you just got to keep going, you got to do it and you gotta do it right. And that's just it. And when it comes to owning a business, it's a lot of things that you need to do.
Right. So it ends up being a bunch. But I just remind myself. Through looking at my client's testimonials or through looking at the pictures of then even reaching out to me and telling me, like I saw my face for the first time and I almost cry, or I was finally able to answer a FaceTime call without feeling anxious about putting on makeup or my mom who never says anything nice to me complimented my skin.
Those little things kind of put, I just picture them in my own life. And I'm like, Love that for people. I want them to feel that every day and that gets me through the hard times. For sure.
[00:13:43] Drea: That's so beautiful.
[00:13:44] Bren: The thing about the reason why I sought this out was because I have so many things that I want to say. And so many things that I want to teach people and display that by the time I'm done working, I get home and I'm like mentally fried and I haven't been able to do that.
And I know that I have so much more to give in terms of like, The easiest way to say it is like free stuff like that for the people who just follow me and can't show up at my studio and stuff like that, I have so much that I want to give. So now I have a clear path of like, I can share my knowledge with people I can share, or I can answer questions freely, things like that.
And. I think as much as that's going to help me grow, it's going to actually help the people that have been following me for years. I have people from all over the country that follow me and they're super, just loyal followers, but they might never come to New York and I want to give something back to them as well.
[00:14:51] Drea: That's so amazing. And also so aligned with another part of your bio that I love, which is that. You dream of combining activism with your degree. Can you talk a little bit more about that is like the ways that you give back with what you do?
[00:15:07] Bren: I think for a very long time, I shied away from even speaking about activism.
I. Sometimes I look back at photos and from the earliest times, and like high school and college, I was at some type of protest. And the first time I learned the word opinionated, was in like sixth grade when my teacher was like, you are too opinionated. So I always like shied away from doing that, especially when you're representing an employer.
It just felt like I had no space for that. So I wanted to definitely make that a huge part of my business because it's a huge part of who I am. I, whether I do it behind closed doors or I do it publicly, I always seek to help people. If I have something, why not give it to someone else? If I can give knowledge for free food for free, like.
I'm a giver. That's just how I've always been. So in the way that I implement it in my business is a little bit more structured now, where for example, when I had to be closed down for eight months during the early parts of quarantine I just didn't feel right. Sitting like I should've rested probably, but I didn't.
And I had a bunch of inventory for t-shirts. So I was just selling t-shirts and donating like 90 or 80% of the proceeds to. A lot of organizations that were on ground or shipping things to like Seattle when they were doing their protests donating to the black lives matter movement. I had my clients kind of just really follow me through that whole, I guess, six months of activism of being at the protest, handing out free water, handing out free supplies, masks, stuff like that.
I guess it clicked to me then that , this can be on display. It's totally, it's actually a good thing for you to have a voice. And I stopped muting myself I guess. And it worked really well because it ties in exactly with what I want to do, which is be there for people like us, be there for people of color, for first-generation people.
Some even undocumented people that come to me and. I don't even know where to get a COVID test in the early beginning of sorry, not a COVID test, a vaccine, because I was asked for my papers and even just me being able to be like, no, like that is not how it's supposed to work. Let me find you a place.
Fulfills me so much more than just being like, this is my product and buy it for 10 99. So. Activism mental wellness and the way that we portray ourselves to the world, I feel like are so intertwined and they really make maybe not for a person who doesn't grow up with struggles, but for most of my clientele, You know, people who English might not have been their first language, who are first-generation, whose parents were as hardworking as my mom who maybe couldn't be there, all these little things that form you into being a person and adult, a fully functional person in society.
Everything ties in with how you are willing or able to present yourself to the world.
[00:18:24] Drea: I could not agree with this more. And. I love seeing people like you that are making a change with doing something that they love. Cause I think that when you can combine the two magic happens. And I also love what you said, because I think that the real change that happens in the world is when you are coming from a place of so much love that all you want to do.
Share with people, how you're spreading that love, whether it be through, you know, like creating an interview to like highlight someone or whether it be sharing a product that's going to help someone. Or like you said, like sharing where the locations are for certain vaccines or, or the COVID tests, like you were saying, all of that creates positive impact.
Nothing is too small. And I think that that's something that I also always strive for, it's never too small of an act, even complimenting someone like I have seen when I compliment someone, how their face lights up, like, oh, wow, thank you for stopping me and telling me that you like my hair.
It just , it not only creates. A positive effect on them, but you also feel like why wouldn't I say that? You know why? Yeah. It
[00:19:42] Bren: costs nothing and it's so much more impactful to say something kind than to take time out of your day to judge or criticize people. I have definitely just taken that path in life.
If I see something nice, I'm going to tell you, even if you think I'm a little weird and I'm like coming up to you and being like, oh my God, I love your hair. Like it is
[00:20:09] Drea: what it is
[00:20:10] Bren: I also did forget to mention, I always forget to like mention the things that I'm doing, but I created, I want to say last summer a small little shop on my website.
Has six items and each item gives back 10% of our profits to a specific organization. So for example, the guasha stone gives back to stop AAPI hate which has been a really big thing, especially in New York city. A lot of Asian people have been getting attacked. So I. Chinese traditional medicine tool.
It only makes sense to give back to the community. I also have grinders that give back to the last prisoner project, which is a project that is working to remove any incarceration for cannabis offenses, which I agree with wholeheartedly as well. So there's six organizations that I'm consistently giving back to.
I just feel like that's just the right way to do things. There's no way that we can benefit from, for example, a lot of skincare benefits from knowing all these traditional Chinese medicine methods. And there's no way that you can't acknowledge where that knowledge came from and how we benefit from certain things.
We can't forget where it came from and who may have been affected on the route to us benefiting from it.
[00:21:36] Drea: I'm speechless Bren. And this is so admirable and inspirational, honestly. It really feels like you can just tell you're so selfless and you just love to give back. And I really believe that we need more people like you in the world.
It really does make such a difference. And I'm so grateful that you get to share that. The fact that you were spreading that every single day in your business is such a cool thing.
It's just so cool and admirable. So I commend you for that.
[00:22:06] Bren: I appreciate that.
[00:22:08] Drea: Yeah. What would you say to someone that wants to take the path that you've taken? Whether it is opening their own practice or having something like a service and combining it with a positive effect, like giving back to a community.
[00:22:25] Bren: I would truly say that no idea is wild enough. If I would have told myself four years ago that I would be putting my passion for music, with how I curate music in my studio and my passion for skincare and activism. And somehow still using my super expensive college degree, I would have been like, no way, like you just got into so much student debt and you're going to just like throw all these ideas in one no way.
But the truth is that you can, because. The thing that I personally think keeps businesses thriving and growing, especially the ones that aren't , you know, funded by VCs and stuff like that. When you're doing it out of your own pocket, out of your own grit, the only way to really do it with so much love and passion is to do it with things that really matter to you.
And there's always a way to make things. Interconnected. It's just about organizing your thoughts, organizing your plan and really committing to it. Because I won't say these first few years of my business, especially doing this during the pandemic, this is like hard mode, tens 10. It's not easy.
I won't lie to people and tell them like, oh, you'll be fine. Like, just get really good at social media. And people will come because you want to keep people. You want to make sure that they have good things to say, so. Just becoming very detailed in what you want to get out of it. And what you want to put in is the best starting point and continuously investing in yourself.
Like I have taken extra courses, I have taken coaching all these things that will eventually pay off their upfront costs for sure. But you want to make sure that you're constantly improving.
[00:24:18] Drea: Yeah, I'll second that, because I think that when you are able to mesh a lot of the same things that you love, like interests, like you were saying, like the love for music is like the music that you put on for your clients and the part that you have such a big passion to give back that you're able to do that with the products that you sell , in your practice.
. Finding ways it's so creative, you know what I mean? Like you can find so many different ways to make all the things that you love work, and it doesn't have to be the same as anyone else, you know, it can be your own way of doing, something that you love or, you know, combining all the things that you
[00:24:54] Bren: love.
Right? Yeah,
[00:24:56] Drea: absolutely.
I think something else to point out is that you don't have to choose one thing, with that point that you were saying, some people I feel myself included and, you know, until I really pushed myself to start the podcast was to realize that I don't have to just be a songwriter.
Right. I don't just have to be a podcaster. I can be both, but I think that there's a very old school way of thinking where you studied something and that's what you have to do for the rest of your life. And then you realize as you get older and you become a different person and you grow and you get different interests and you meet different people, you realize that you actually have other things that you want to try out, or you actually want to, you know, figure out this is something you could do better.
And I think it's really important to honor that feeling. See if maybe you can combine those two or have them be a part of your life in different ways, but together.
[00:25:53] Bren: Oh yeah. I am such an advocate against 18 year olds having to decide what they're doing for the rest of their lives. Like 18 year old me did not even know.
Half of these career paths existed in 18 year old. There wasn't even like things like coding that were super out there. So telling people that they have to choose what they want to do. I changed my career path at 28. I completely was like, Nope, that's not going to work. So I don't think there should be anything set in stone because the more you learn about yourself, the more you become clear about what you want to get out of life.
For a lot of people, especially in minority households, it's you got to get a good job that pays you well, so you can be good, like basically, and that's doctor, engineer, lawyer. Those are like the top three that are typically spoken about. I was getting paid. Okay. And I was losing hair. I was getting sick every day.
I was surrounded by so many racist people and I was just miserable. And when I told my mom, like I made it to the executive board and I'm at these meetings and I leave feeling like , I don't want that for my life. And I don't want to show up. That type of parent for my kid, the parent who's burnt out, exhausted, involved in work all the time.
I saw how hard my mom worked and she couldn't make it to my concert. She couldn't make it to these things. Not intentionally at all. I knew that I wanted to change that path even just a little bit for the next generation.
[00:27:40] Drea: That's so beautiful. Bren I have loved having you on the podcast. I don't think I've smiled so much during an interview. Thank you. Please let us know where we can find you. And if someone wants to book a consultation or if someone wants to book a treatment or a facial where they
[00:27:58] Bren: can find.
Sure. So I am actually working on making virtual options more accessible to people as well, because I know that coming in frequently is not always accessible to everyone. So that will be also posted on my social, which is the bar.co. And my website is thebarskincare.com. I also have a TikTok. That is @thebar.co as well and.
Yeah, follow me. Get to know me. I am a little funny. I'm a little sarcastic. I do
[00:28:34] Drea: skincare. I love that. Thank you so much for being on the podcast. I cannot wait for people to hear this. Thank you so much. It was awesome.